Learning to be Happy Again

Calzona Review 11x 12 “The Great Pretender” 

Hahahaha.

That comprised my viewing experience of 11x12.

Hadn’t laughed this much in an episode of Grey’s in a long time. After the buckets of tears  shed last week,  this episode was  a welcome relief. 

Just a reminder that we are on board Shondaland’s emotional roller coaster, so after the “tears and sadness” level  last week,  this episode brought us to  the “fun and laughter”  level.

Let me describe this episode in two words: Refreshing. Breakthrough.

The entire episode  had most of its characters  reaching   a “breakthrough” and it  was light. Hilarious even. A feel-good episode, overall.

Here is this episode’s long  list of “Finally’s”:

Meredith finally learned to  be by herself and be her own person and loved it.

Owen and Amelia finally gave in to their feelings of vulnerability and saw endearing comfort in each other (this is fine for me until Cristina comes back at series end. Crowen forever).

Bailey aided Ben’s brother to finally  stop pretending about his sexual preference and to  come into his own and  be happy with who he really is.

Catherine finally articulated to Richard what was setting them back, saying he had to like and accept her for what she is.

Alex finally let out his true feelings and blurted out randomly that he is going  to “marry that girl” –Jo of course.

Callie finally realized she could get her game into play.

Arizona established a friendship with her mentor, and oh what a hilarious friendship this has turned out to be.

All these  breakthroughs—refreshing I must say.

Makes me very excited  to get to the next episodes and fast!

We saw a lot of Callie and Arizona  in this episode (thank goodness!) and it was pleasant to see them have FUN. Both Jessica and Sara equally stood out as they carried their comic timing to perfection.

It was heartwarming to see both Callie and Arizona have fun , although without each other. The important thing was, we saw them happy.

And the voiceover on sharing secrets and truth goes...

“Everybody has something to hide. We can’t just expose all our secrets to the world.  That’s how we get hurt. That’s how we risk hurting other people. We have to decide how much we let out. And keep the truth to ourselves. “

The "shower" scene

In Arizona’s first scene, It took me a while to remember  that she lived with Alex and Jo. And  it was amusing to see how they got along domestically.

To have her way with priority shower time because she “had rounds”, Jo bullied her way to  bath time success.  Who would stop laughing at seeing  Arizona helpless as she was, ejected from the bathroom,  as Jo used her cunning  to manipulate the shower time game. She stripped naked, and Arizona was all of  embarrassed and helpless and pissed.  This scene, from the onset, signaled that there was more funny to come in this episode.

Everyone’s getting their Freaky

Callie ribbing Mer that it was the good kind of exhausted got things rolling.

“Did you even leave the bedroom? Was he surprised? Yeah did he freak? Or did you just go straight to getting freak-ay?”

How Sara drops these hilarious  lines in her uniquely brilliant comedic manner is beyond me. Pure talent.

All the freaky talk let out what was in Callie’s inner thoughts   “Everyone’s getting freaky but me”

So here I sense that her outspokenness on her insecurity about not getting  “freaky” , was saying a lot. Comparing her state with that of others, meant that the yearning was there.  The hunger was there.  She had no one to get freaky with. And that’s sadness. But count on Callie to take it all in stride and use humor to cope with it.

Then in her convo with astounded bestie and confidante  Owen, she was transparent in her venting.

Callie: I used to be so good at one-night stands. I used to be great at them. But now, whenever I’m not watching Sofia,  I sit alone at home in my pajamas.  I want to be out of my pajamas and not  alone. 

Owen: So go, meet someone. It’s easy

Callie: Oh it’s easy. Well what do you do? What’s your line?

Owen : I don’t use lines . I’m just honest.

It was touching how Owen opened up about how he usually introduces himself and Callie’s expression was just so on point (as is all her expressions in this ep, not just in this ep but the entire season, and not just the entire season but the whole series since she started)

Callie : You’ve got game, Major Hunt

Fetal Posse in the House  #TeamFetal

How I wish we had seen more of the Herman-Arizona friendship in the past episodes. Their chemistry as friends was dynamite. It led me to think, instead of having an  overdose of drama involving Herman and Robbins in the previous episodes, we could have gotten more funny scenes with them. Geena Davis is just a fantastic actress.  Her versatility shines through in both drama and comedy.

Jessica as funny Arizona did not come unprepared. She was on point with her comical antics. Pure comic perfection. Callie is usually always most hilarious, but in this episode, Arizona was equally hilarious. Both Jessica and Sara owned this episode with their funny.

In this ep, Herman saw Arizona in a whole new light. It was a mini 'getting-to-know-you' starting from that scene where Herman was to have a scan and she was teasing Arizona about living with residents,  “You’re a  grown up. Get your own place, I need you focused here”

Oh my . This line made me think. It was actually a nice touch  to hear that casually said in this kind of scene—about  Arizona and her choices. Having Herman point that out in her infamous  tactless manner, It was indeed humorous. But it had pushed forward one thought which we had taken for granted.

Herman did have a point. Why was Arizona even living with Alex when she could very well afford to live anywhere? Easy answer. It was to emphasize her aloneness. She did not want to be alone. Simple.

Herman making light of being in a brain scan situation, dropped  her direct, humorous but tactless jabs, :

“So did Wilson climb in the shower with you?

“Was she coming on to you?”

Arizona being taken aback and tongue-tied with Herman’s funny tirades was a laugh a minute. It was really refreshing to see them having fun. We were so used to all the seriousness of the Herman-Arizona scenes. Seeing this from them was just sunshine.

Handsy Arizona

That Alex, Herman and Arizona scene was simply tops in the funny meter when they talked about the “naked resident.” This scene was hands(y) down  the funniest scene of 11x12. No pun intended.

With Arizona being put on the spot while telling Alex to tell Jo to avoid a repeat of what happened that morning,  Alex nonchalantly supplied  Herman with an ample amount  of ammunition to tease Arizona with ,

“And Robbins can get handsy with the residents. Last year, she got handsy. HR got involved, there are policies now”

Herman: Because of YOU? Robbins, that’s incredible.

Arizona: It’s NOT. Both of you, stop, okay? Alex, it’s inappropriate. She’s a resident, I’m her superior. I’m a girl who likes girls, it just puts us both in an awkward position an you should respect that

Alex: Ah I’m kinda down for whatever happens  (I’m seriously on the floor laughing my lungs out)

Arizona: I’m gonna kill you

Alex: You need to start putting on  pants around the house cause Robbins just keeps checking out your ass

Arizona: No, No, Alex…you can leave your pants on okay? Your ass is…

Herman: Fine, that’s reportable

Arizona: I hate you all. I have surgery.

Robbins simply gained new respect from Herman and it was amazing that  the more Robbins asked Alex and Herman to stop their ribbing, the more  hilarious this  scene got. She just suddenly got interesting in Herman’s eye.

Dirty Arizona

And then that time when they got to talk to each other one on one, I couldn’t resist recalling their lines:

Herman: You’re a hypocrite…You were so high and mighty when I was bossing you around…which one was it? Which resident did you sully?  …You can’t suddenly become interesting and then clam up.

Arizona: It was a year ago and she’s gone now.

Herman: Weren’t you married last year?

Arizona: Yes. No. We were broken up.

Herman: I thought you just split

Arizona: I cheated on Callie, okay?

Herman: Oh my God. How have you been hiding this from me?

Arizona: Hiding what?

Herman: The dirt. Youre dirty. And here I thought you were no fun at all.

Arizona: Stop it , I’m…

Herman: You’re a dirty dirty girl. You’re dirty.

I’m dying of laughter remembering this scene.

Arizona didn’t have a chance. To Herman, there was an added interesting dimension to Arizona. And them laughing about it together was just adorable. A new friendship was born. Sadly, we don’t know how long Herman will last on the show. To be honest, I feel it won’t be for long.

Arizona’s realization

It was touching to watch Arizona and Herman pour their souls out to each other on the “stolen” couch,  

Arizona: I used to skate around the halls of this hospital…(reminded us of her lost leg) I used to go dancing, I used to flirt and be flirted with. Now I live in a house full of naked people. All of my friends are her friends. And I have this work and I never have to go home. “

Then she heard Herman voice out her feelings, about her past and always thinking of what her ex thought, what others thought. Herman dished out very important advice: “But now, I do what I want, when I want. And it’s sweet. …to tell you Robbins, my life is so much better now that  I have nothing. I cant recommend a tumor but you should try it.“

Such poignant words that hit Arizona (and us)  right to the core--nothingness makes people appreciate what they have at the moment. That it strips away the unimportant concerns and makes one’s mind clearer on what is truly essential in life.

Seeing Arizona’s support for Herman warms my heart.

Herman : I’m gonna stay here until it’s over. Whatever that means.

Arizona: Then I’ll stay with you tonight

Arizona has that unselfish  support for a new friend. It moved me to see Arizona's sincerity to  Herman, after seeing her sincere to April in the past episodes. This woman has  much love in her heart for friends, even if she is going through her own pain.

Herman’s straight-faced  “You should know, I’m not gonna have sex with you” was enough to make me roll on the floor laughing. Count on Herman to transform  a serious situation such as having a brain scan  or talking about her brain tumor,  into something to laugh about.

A new true friendship is born…and I’m happy that it does give Arizona happiness. She has somebody to care for. I just do not know until when Herman is going to stay. They looked sad and uncertain about the impending surgery, but being happy in the moment   is the best thing to do.

Callie’s eureka moment

Callie’s encounter with her pretender patient, (who did not have enough guts to tell reject her  boyfriend who proposed marriage to her, that she pretended to  faint, causing her to fall down concrete stairs), importantly opened her mind and finally gave her that much needed push to explore the world for more happiness opportunities.

The girl, Hilary, said her boyfriend Todd was boring so she pretended to faint to make him stop talking.

This paved the  way for this Callie-Amelia conversation:   

Callie: Oh Todd’s the problem here? He cares too much, he’s willing to devote himself fully to another person. That’s a problem?

Amelia: If it makes the other person want to pass out, yeah

Callie: Well then that’s it. That’s why I can’t pick people up anymore because I don’t know how to put them back down. That’s why I have no game.

And when Amelia talked about her own challenges with her game, I couldn’t help but be struck when Callie said : “same here,  game over”

There was that feeling of submission. She had given up. She felt she had no more hope in the love and companionship department. And that was a sad state to be in.

It was funniest  seeing Callie with her  angered but oh-so-funny expressions while behind Todd,  gesturing to the patient to tell her boyfriend the truth. She had to do it right there.  But Hilary was too chicken and fake-fainted again.

Badass Callie had too much of this and decided to step in with  her signature Callie move: “Todd, what Hilary is trying to tell you is that she’s trying to break up with you. ..I’m so sorry I know that all you want is to help her but she doesn’t want that.  She doesn’t deserve it. She’s faking this right now.”

This line here is very important, as if she is talking to herself:

“Todd, you deserve someone that needs you there. You know?  Someone who needs the kind of attention  that only you can give. And it’s not gonna be Hilary okay? And it shouldn’t be. And you will be fine, without her. And it may take a while finding the right person but you will find her.  You should start looking, okay?

And Amelia chimes in “She’s right. Don’t waste another minute. Start right now.”

Now if these lines aren’t for Callie, then I don’t know what is.

Apart from the impressive display of unadulterated badassness from the Ortho Goddess (and at this moment, Love Guru), what’s  important to focus on here is the parallel situation here between Todd and Callie.

Both are loving and caring and attentive to the people they love. Callie was speaking to Todd from experience, from what she knew for sure.

She told Todd to look for someone who deserves the love and attention that he could give. And it goes the same for her. No use wasting time. They both should start right that moment.

And so, in the latter part of the ep, we saw Callie at Joe’s, and  confidently  struck  up a conversation with a handsome man, who was enthralled by  charming,  beautiful Callie.  It seemed that the sound advice cum pep talk she gave Todd, was as applicable to herself.

Seemed like it gave her more confidence to realize she deserved someone. She deserved to be happy too.

All her experiences with her patient and with co-workers  in the episode, caused her to mull over  her own situation:  Everybody was getting freaky, except her. The loneliness became too much. She was realizing her own lack of fun. She knew she had no confidence. Consistent with that scene she had with Jenna the tech rep, where she seemed to have forgotten  how attractive she was.

Here was a beautiful lady, successful, but had forgotten her own gifts. She had forgotten that she is worthy of love. Forgotten that she was valuable.  Forgotten to love herself. She was lost in the exhaustion from troubles that beset her life and marriage. One thing was sure, though, Callie did want to have fun again.

And these made her remember that she was good at these things, like one-night-stands. She was worthy. She just had to put herself out there and quit shirking from adventure. She had to go back to what she was. Callie lost herself and is now found.

And her epiphany was  because of that loving dude Todd.

Todd was her eyeopener. Todd who  showered his undying love to a person who did not want it and did not deserve it.

Both Callie and Todd  just had to find that place in life where their love will be valued. To be given love as much as they would .

But wait, I do not mean that she was less loved by Arizona. Of course not. Arizona loves her too,  so much.  It's just that circumstances led to problems that led Callie to give and give until she lost herself.

And knowing Callie-- that woman with a heart of platinum-- she deserves so much love.

Oh, yes,  she danced the night away with that handsome man. And she was happy.

On Happiness for Callie and Arizona

So all of us who still don’t want Callie to explore other opportunities for love, I’d say why don’t we want Callie to be happy?

She and Arizona had been separated for a while now. Since seven episodes ago. They are broken up.

The last thing I would want is to see  them  sulking. I’m thinking, would I rather want to see them moping about each other for ten episodes while broken up? Or emptily longing for each other when they clearly had problems with each other.

Why  can’t we  let them be happy for a change?  Even if that happiness is not with each other…for now..  Because if this episode had proven anything, it had shown us that Callie and Arizona  both started to discover their own happiness as individuals.  Solo happiness.

After certain realizations they separately had in this episode, they are discovering new things to laugh about and be cheerful for. They are learning to glory in their own gifts and own set of friends. They had not seen each other for a while but they realize they are surviving and thriving. They are not co-dependent. Because happiness was never about dependence.

Happiness was never because of a person.

This ep showed us that happiness can be found in being alone. Coming into one’s own.  It’s loving oneself first, and  through experiences,  filling up oneself  down inside,  enough to be able to share that love eventually to another.

Our baby Callie is smiling again. And that happiness reflects in her eyes. What more could we want right now?

And as a side note, it was nice to see that Callie heard points of view about love beginnings from both Owen and Amelia, both of whom had a mutual attraction. Callie was in the middle of a budding love thang.

Meanwhile our baby Arizona, who reflected on how she was during happier days, her wheelie days,  in her adorable new friendship with her mentor, is enjoying herself too. She had been a nurturing friend  (to April) and now a caring one, as she good-naturedly handles Herman’s unique humor, and supports her.

They both intimated their innermost longings to their friends,  as the closing voice-over goes..

“It’s not safe to blurt out all of our secrets. We cant just lay  all the truth out there. Expose ourselves to God and everybody. Cause once the truth is out, we have to face it ourselves.”

Moving forward

There is still that big Herman-Arizona episode next week. I’m wary because we are at the height of fun right now and roller coaster rules dictate we need to gradually be ready for a plunge in emotions.

Aside from a lot of fetal surgeries surgeries lined up by Herman for them to perform, and promo pics showing a lot of Herman and Arizona, I wonder what’s next for Arizona, after having been given advice by Herman on the appreciation of life.

And Callie, what happens next after she went dancing with that handsome man? Something was unleashed within Callie that day, let’s see what she does further.

Saw the sneak peek and hooray! It had Callie and Arizona! They were  in the same cafeteria although seated  at different tables distant from each other,  and  Callie was jealous of Arizona!

Exciting episode coming up. Just a few more days to go.

The journey continues.

Whatever happens, always remember,  It’s all good.

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