Spoils of War

Calzona Review  Grey's Anatomy 12x23 "At Last"

Boom.

Two things happened in this episode. Penny and Callie broke up, and Callie and Arizona reach temper limits in their custody arrangement.

And these happened during Callie and Arizona's combined close to six minutes screen time.

Meaty.

Let's recall what happened exactly...and allow me (via my intrusive analysis), to make six minutes of Calzona screen time feel like it was a whole episode of Calzona.

Prelude to the break up

Penny dropped in on Callie in the scan room doing techie things with bone graphics.

 

Penny:  I called the landlord and he agreed to swap out our two-bedroom lease for something smaller. Since, I mean i figured that I could save on rent ... so I could afford to fly back on weekends to Seattle to you know, visit you and Sofia.

Callie: Okay.

Penny: Okay?

Callie: Yeah sounds good.

Penny : I don't want to leave when we're like this.  We've barely talked.

Callie: I really don't know what to say.

Penny: Neither do I but I am trying to say words and be here and help.

Callie: You've helped enough.

Penny: Okay...okay.

Callie did not look at Penny for most of that time. Something was not okay. And Penny, though anxious, decided to give Callie space.
 

Nice and Gracious

 

Arizona had that sly Cheshire Cat smile when she and BFF April spotted Callie walking toward them.

 

Arizona: ooh (sarcasm mixed with a hint of irrational delight)

April strictly reminded her ..

April: Be nice.

Arizona: I know. But God, she put me through hell.

April: I know. And you won. You can afford to be magnanimous.

Callie : Hey guys!
 

Arizona had that plastered smile on her face.   

 Callie was very humble.

Callie: Well, I was wondering if uhm...I have had a surgery come up late this week and so  i wanted to ask if i could please have Sofia Tuesday night instead of Thursday


Arizona:  so if I allow you ... to have Sofia on Tuesday then in exchange I will have her Friday?

Callie : Yeah sure if that's  what you want.

Arizona: Great. Okay then I will make that work.

Callie: Thank you

And Callie leaves looking grateful.
 

April: She's gone.

Arizona:Huh?

 

April: If I were you I'd lose that crazed smile before you start cramping

April had been chugging her juice nervously during the encounter because it was awkward to witness the conversation between the un-couple.

One was having a fun time lording it over the custody game while the other was so respectful and humble and so un-Callie Torres i was choking from amusement. Goodness,  these two can make chemistry appear in even the most awkward of scenes.

The BreakUp

Beyonce's "Pray You Catch Me" pipes in and Callie seemed irritated when Penny peeked and stalled at the door checking if she could talk to Callie who was doing her ortho screwing thing.

Callie: Either come in or stay out. Don't do whatever it is you're doing

Penny: Okay. I was thinking maybe i can postpone leaving. For just a little while just until  things are better. Until you and I are better.

 

And here we see Callie's reason for being quiet and indifferent that day:

Callie: What's  the point? What? Two days a week? We both know how this ends.

 

Penny: No, I dont. But apparently you do. So why don't...

Callie: We'll drag this out sure. You can wait here and then things will get superficially better and then you'll leave. And then we'll let things taper off the way things taper off over long distance and then we'll be sorry and make promises that are just a lie. It's all a lie because I'm not leaving without Sofia and you would never forgive me if you give up your grant so I'm stuck here Penny, I'm stuck and there's no good solution.

Penny: Callie, why won't  you look at me? Are you breaking up with me? Is that it?

Callie: Maybe instead of dragging this out, maybe we should just call it now. Yeah we should. You should go.

Sara's acting in this breakup scene, where she only faces the camera,  her expression of the gradual progression of pain was ultimately amazeballs.
 

 
Arizona and Callie at the NICU
 

Callie approaches Arizona at the NICU while Arizona was checking on baby patients.

 

Callie : Hi. Is there any way that I could also have Sofia tonight? I know you've already  moved things around, thank you again so much by the way,  it's just that i really need to. Could I have her tonight? Please i just ... it's been a tough day.

Arizona : You're right. We already did move things around or rather i already moved things around for you.

Callie: I know and i thought that's why you'd be  okay.

Arizona : To bend the rules for your convenience? Rules that only exist because you put us and all of our friends through hell?

Callie: No I'm sorry, i just...

 

Callie was about to walk away but Arizona blew her top:

Arizona: You know, you chose this. And you ruined everything. And yet you still expect me to leap to fulfill your needs , i did that. I did that this morning.

Callie: Okay Arizona i get it. You're angry.

Arizona: I wasn't angry. I was gracious. I was nice and i was accommodating and i tried to help you and yet here you are again asking for even more. I do not have anymore to give you. You have used up all of my grace.

 

Callie took  all of Arizona's wrath without saying anything  anymore and walked away with a blank expression.
 

Penny leaves

Blake, after the breakup, had  gathered her things and decided to leave for New York for the fellowship. While sobbing, she had one last convo with Meredith, which was really sad but made light by Meredith who seemed to not be a hugger. To Penny at least.

Just needed to post this convo here to note the true love Penny had for Callie but it was not meant to be and this is the formal confirmation of their breakup:

Penny:  I came here for her, i stayed for her i thought we were gonna be together. It doesn't really matter what i thought. We're over. We don't work anymore.

Penny hugged Mer and it was not a dramatic hug but a type of funny hug that makes you to want to wait for the punchline and laugh so that you won't feel so bad. And Mer in her awkwardness, had words of consolation for her protege whom she shared a unique history with:

Mer: It'll be okay Blake. You will be okay. You will pick yourself up and you will kick yourself some fellowship ass.

In the final Arizona scene, Arizona and Webber were at the reception area

 

Arizona: And she's standing there with these sad eyes like she's  the victim. She's not the victim, Callie caused all this, she set it all in motion and now here we are and there is not one part of it that doesn't suck.

Notes:

The Break Up

Honestly, it has been  difficult trying to decipher Callie's thoughts about Penny after the results of the custody battle.

Remember when she brushed off Penny's comforting hand while at Mer's house? Well she is still consistent with that attitude in this episode. For a while there, you would think Callie had lost love for Penny but maybe not.
 
I admire Penny for ignoring Callie's rejection of her offer of comfort and still tried to push the relationship forward despite Callie's  major setback of losing physical custody of Sofia.

She tried to do everything from her end, to adjust to the results of the custody battle. She changed her New York two bedroom lease to a smaller unit and had even planned to shuttle back to Seattle twice a week just to see Callie and Sofia.

These are efforts of someone who is still in love. Penny was not one to easily just give it up despite Callie's lackadaisical interest to talk with her about arrangements. We could clearly see she was trying to adjust everything, even offering to postpone going to New York for a while, just to make it work.

Unfortunately, (or in this blog's case, "fortunately") , Callie has become a different person to Penny after the trial. Trying hard to examine her psyche, i assume :

1. She was shaken up, traumatized about the thought of losing Sofia, that she gained a perspective of what was most important to her. This situation may have transformed Callie a bit from being an "all for love" girl,  to a more practical one. To her, it's clear now that Sofia comes first, all other passions were relegated to second place.

Or

2. As I said in last episode's review, she may have come to equate her relationship with Penny with losing custody of her child. So being with Penny serves as a painful reminder

Or

3. She just feels the situation sucks and she is letting it be. Her non-belief in long distance relationships weighs more than her love for Penny. She has had enough  experience so she has realistic foresight that the long distance arrangement will not work.

So rather than drag it out, when she knows in the end, they'll have the same broken ending, she broke up with Penny.

It takes guts to be decisive about ending a relationship when you still love a person. Badass Callie was brave and practical enough to call it quits.

One thing though, Callie was clearly in pain when she told Penny about wanting to break up. We could feel the deep pain she felt by her expressions which Sara Ramirez dished out ever so intensely. Sara expertly showed us the emotions of a woman struggling with the feeling of hurting inside and hurting a person who loved her much.

She obviously did not want to hurt Penny, who loved her and stuck by her through it all, but Callie's practical side took over. It may deeply hurt at this time but this will be better rather than prolonging the agony of a relationship that is not to be.

I am a Calzona shipper but to be objective, seeing any relationship end is sad, especially when you see the other person doing everything to make it work while the other has made the choice to give up.

Ouch.

But yeah this was necessary because we truly know who are mint to be...
All thanks and kudos to Penny, a very fine woman whom i never found anything to criticize with because she was a really decent person who had given much love to our dear Calliope.

She enriched Callie's life, made her feel loved, but in the end, she was to be a lesson and a blessing to Callie.

Most of all, Penny was a necessary presence to move the Calzona relationship sideways for now, but eventually, forward. Wink.

Penny's grant was the reason they even had a custody battle. Now I am stoked to see how it will impact the Calzona story even further.

Custody Battle Aftermath Starring Callie and Arizona

Many comments have been thrown back and forth on social media, both defensive, sorrowful and some downright vile. Of course, a situation like this will always breed contempt from any of the sides, and as per usual, disagreements ensue on who is the better character and this is good because it encourages each one to express her own unique opinion. Expression of self is great, as long as it involves healthy and respectful discourse among everyone.

Before analyzing each side, let's study the current situation after the heart-wrenching court face-off :

As we remember from the bench scene in 12.22, Callie was conciliatory. Arizona was pissed with Callie.

In the end part of that episode, Arizona was reflective when she finally got Sofia, while Callie was devastated. I actually thought Arizona would still be angry but will be nice to Callie in this episode and maybe show some kind of "pity" for Callie, but no.

Greys showed us something realistic, amusing and actually interesting.

I liked the way this episode made light of the situation in that April-Arizona scene. April was warning Arizona in jest to "be nice" and even to Arizona's counter reply "i know. But God, she put me through hell.

April did her BFF duties and tried to keep her friend's actions in check,  "you won. You can afford to be magnanimous."

I could just imagine how Arizona during her in-between-surgeries chats with April related how pissed off she was about the whole court battle that transpired and maybe a bit gloating about her victory.

So April knows Arizona's state of mind, that explains her reminder to her bff to be nice. The scene was even made more fun as April chugged her juice nervously when the Calzona un-couple discussed Sofia sharing details.
Arizona was actually nice and accommodating.

Callie seemed to have swallowed a huge chunk of humble pie after the court loss. Seemed as if she had been extra respectful to Arizona when asking for changes to their Sofia sharing schedule. Of course many will feel this as shattering considering she is Sofia's birth mother and now she is reduced to asking permission to have time for her child.

(I would rather skip explaining how this situation is justified.  I have always found that custody battle crappy as crap, but it happened. So this is all justified. This was the court's decision and this was settled with no discrimination between birth mother and adoptive mother. All that has been tackled in last week's 24-page review.)

I appreciated how Greys made this first scene fun.  And not taking sides, it was not meant to be taken so seriously and in effect, offend the viewer. Even the playful background music said it was not a dramatic scene so CHILL.

It was cute to see them in this kind of scene where Arizona was sort of basking in the glory of her victory and therefore had the "power" to dictate Sofia's schedule. She was gloating on the inside sure, even April knew this, but really, give Arizona a minute to enjoy that.

Rather than us being judgmental about her rubbing it in that she had sole physical custody, let's give her that for a minute.

After all, Callie's rash decision indeed created huge problems for both of them. As she said, it put her through hell, so back off and give Arizona a little time to enjoy the glory of her triumph. After all, she was not even being selfish to Callie. She actually gave in to Callie's request and moved things around. Let her enjoy seeing Callie asking permission from her and saying yes to what she wanted for one minute.

Callie, with her extra humble demeanor around Arizona is a sign that she knew her place losing the custody battle and was extra nice so as not to ruffle any feathers further that may even mean she might get reduced time with Sofia if she displeases Arizona in any way.

To be honest, It was actually a delight to watch this scene because i saw sparks between these two in that scene. Tee hee. If anything, for me it felt uhm... Charming.

It is a lot better to watch them in a scene like this because it shows expressive  interaction with each other, rather than having a casual boring scene with Callie telling her about her new girl or something in an impersonal way.

This scene is about the two of them having interesting direct interaction about each other. Arizona is making Callie go through a bit of hell and Callie is the ever so respectful yes-girl ex-wife.  Cuteness, really.

Let's not wreck the fun moment when these people are just going through the motions after that unpleasant court trial. It put Arizona through hell, so she's just giving Callie a little taste of it. This first scene was done in a FUN mood.  It was not meant to be too serious.

I'm thinking this episode was  just showing Callie repenting for her mistake of recklessly assuming to take Sofia with her without consideration for Arizona. So let's give that just this minute. It will only last for their  six minute screentime. It is highly doubtful it will be the same theme next episode.

When Callie Used Up all of Arizona's Grace

This second Calzona  scene revealed the two different mindsets of Callie and Arizona at the aftermath of the custody battle and this difference caused them to not be in sync with each other and made matters serious.

The breakup with Penny tore Callie's heart apart.  Yes, she initiated it but she was evidently hurting. In that breakup scene, where she could not even face Penny, because she did not want to see Penny in pain nor did she want to show Penny how hurt she was.   

It was obvious she still did have love for Penny and it pained her to break Penny's heart. She knows Penny still loves her a lot, but she had to do it mainly because she was a strong non-believer of long distance relationships so she did not want to linger in a doomed relationship.

That's Calliope Torres for you. Practical, with sound foresight and is badass in doing what has to be done,  even if it hurts so bad.

So as she dealt with her pain, she felt she needed her beloved daughter to stay by her side. Sofia was the only one who could give her comfort at a very sad time like this.

Maybe Arizona who had been so gracious to her today, could understand and let her have Sofia tonight.

But Arizona , having been gracious that day, did not have the same mindset as Callie.

She was in that state where she felt she had already been too gracious and giving. Maybe she felt she had been giving enough. In the first place, she never even wanted nor campaigned for sole physical custody  if it were not for her fear of Callie moving away with Sofia. She DID NOT want this at all. If Callie did not rashly make that decision to move across the country with the child,  there would NOT have been a custody battle nor a court ruling in the first place, that put both of them and their friends through that ugly mess.

So we may be offended with Arizona being a sort of bully  now, but we also have to understand that  the court ruled in her favor and she is asserting her right. Let us not overlook that she had been gracious enough to move the schedules around but she did not know that Callie was going through something really bad. Callie may have mentioned that it was a bad day and she needed Sofia to be with her but Arizona was not ready to hear any reasons at this time.

Arizona was in a stage where she felt she was being manipulated into bending the rules according to Callie's wants. She is still in that mindset that it was Callie who brought this upon them and that Callie should accept the consequences this came with.

Arizona seemed to not want to look like a pushover, adhering to all that Callie wanted, when the court clearly decided she won sole physical custody.

With all that happened that led to the court battle, Arizona may have felt spent. She went through the fear, the agony of dreading that she might lose her daughter who might be taken away to another state and which will therefore lessen her time with Sofia. Imagine her stress, her sleepless nights, her stressful discussions with her lawyer, the embarrassment she went through in that courtroom when she was somehow slut-shamed. Cut her some slack. She has unwillingly participated in this court trial because she had to defend her right and she could not bear to see less of Sofia.

Now that she holds sole custody, Arizona is just sticking by the rules and besides, we cannot blame her that she is still pissed off at Callie.

So if she feels that her kindness is being abused or she has already been giving too much, let her be.

She deserves to feel what she wants to feel especially at this time that she is recovering from the stress and trauma that the crisis put her through. She was not even as bitchy as she could have been, so fine, people may say she's cruel or mean, but she is not downright evil. Understand her too, she is just a person reeling from fresh trauma. We know Callie has put her through a lot just because of this Sofia issue and hey, i say it's all fair.

Besides, Callie has been a meek angel in all this and submissively accepts the situation sorrowfully. She knows where she went wrong and she is accepting the consequences. When she said "okay Arizona, I get it,  you're angry," I take this to mean that she accepts Arizona's anger and it feels like she is sorry, so let her be, too.  If Callie is willing to let Arizona process this anger , then we should too. This for sure, shall simmer down. Just wait what happens next episode. Double wink.

When Arizona was blabbering at the hospital reception area talking to Webber about Callie acting like  the victim, it showed she was still angry but she may have been a little guilty too about saying no to Callie. I sensed she was seeking approval from Webber, justifying that she did the right thing.

Webber dismissed this as one of those little things. He had had enough of the petty squabbles between married and unmarried couples at the hospital, he didn't want to engage in them anymore and sauntered off into the loving arms of his Catherine and they rode away in the elevator of love.

I suggest let's be like Webber.  Let them be. They both had justified actions. Arizona wasn't unreasonable with her anger. It's not like she is withholding Sofia from Callie. Not at all.

It is a squabble that is bound to happen between two people who had just gone through a vicious custody battle. They both still have fresh emotions that make them both irrational or even confused,  and both are still adjusting to the new custody arrangement. There are bound to be unfulfilled expectations.

It is hard to look forward to good things about their relationship after this episode. After last week's heartbreaking ep,  we were sure there was nowhere to go but up, but we forgot about it going sideways, with nasty spiked strings attached.

Also not surprising are the passionate emotions from all sides of the Calzona spectrum.

1. Some are furious with why Arizona is acting like a bitch when Callie the birth mother is practically begging to have some time with the daughter she brought into this world in HER womb.

2. Some are defending Arizona saying she has the right because of what she had to put up with in the court battle.

3. Many of us are so very sorry for Callie that we want to hug her like Penny hugged Mer.

4. Some understand the situation, understand both sides and choose to stay neutral and want to hug both forever.

5. And one feels really amused by the episode because the Calzona interaction reminds her of that time in episode 7x12 when Arizona came from Africa and was chasing after Callie and was practically rejected by Callie at every turn because Callie didn't want her back.

Arizona was all humble and asking for forgiveness and did not give up until Callie chose to tell her in the elevator that she was pregnant with Mark's baby and was asked, "how about now?"

This time, it's Callie who is all humble and respectful and Arizona playing the mean card to the hilt. So even if both are different situations, i see the similarity. At least now, I've already seen them both groveling and chasing after the other with the other being a bitch. All is equal now.

And pardon me but i could not cease thinking about how much fun Jessica and Sara had filming these scenes. Sara with the adorable  puppy dog sorry eyes, and Jessica playing the bitchy bully ex-wife. If I remember right, it's the first time Callie had played the sorry character to Arizona's bitch bit. It was  amusing to watch, i rewatched the scenes mutliple  times.

There is one thing to be happy about though in this episode. Much as it saddened me to see Callie and Penny's loving relationship end (because it made Callie happy), I am ecstatic that it finally ended so that it makes way for the truly mint to be couple's story to move forward.

Guarding my heart, I did not want to expect anything beautiful next episode but I still hold on to Kevin McKidd's words from an interview, and of course savior Debbie Allen's tweet with the Capmirez photo caption that says she cannot wait for us to see the finale.

These are exactly Kevin's words in an excerpt of an interview with The Hollywood Reporter:

"In the finale, there's an interesting growth spurt for them. They become enemies in a sense in this episode and they have to in order to protect themselves — and their lawyers are guiding them and they create animosity between opposing sides. But in the finale, there's a spark of something where they go from mortal enemies and the love that was between them resparks in quite an intriguing and surprising way."

And Debbie's tweet that makes me really happy:

So in summary, i don't think it is necessary to panic or be extremely sad because of 12x23. They were mortal enemies in 22 and 23, sure,   but I have reason to believe that the finale will be different. 

Let's see how it will all play out in the last episode of this amazing amazing season.  It is scary to be optimistic but I  look forward to wonderful things for Calzona next episode.

And I truly hope and pray that Sara will stay in Season 13.

One more episode before hiatus. Let's hope it will be great.

May the twenty fourth be in our favor.

Till then.

#CalzonaWillRise

Twitter :

@GAFan8

Two True Mothers

 

 

Once there lived two true mothers and they were beautiful. They loved each other so much. They had a beautiful daughter and they loved her more than anything for she was their  sunshine. One day, something happened so the two mothers went separate ways...but their daughter was still their sunshine...

 

Calzona Review 12x22  “Mama Tried”

The Calzona story never promised us a rose garden. They never promised us sunshine and rainbows forevermore. And they never promised that they would not hurt us.

We had seen Calzona  through multiple peaks and lows in their relationship, but getting into a custody battle was the last thing we would have ever expected to happen between them and it hurt.

Grey’s Anatomy broke our hearts and we let it.

This episode (which was heralded by four sneak peeks) was one of those episodes you dreaded to watch.  Why start an episode that would surely make you emotionally unstable?

No one wants to watch her most favorite couple slug it out in the custody hall of justice only to see their counsels twist what their friends said about them, make their present job seem like a deficiency and their private activities made to look undesirable to the public eye.  We did not want these lawyers  with their lawyer-speak and lawyer-strategies tear their personalities down and tear them further apart.

Just the opening billboard where Callie and Arizona's images slowly fade to white and slide away from each other was enough for me to hesitate to watch this much talked-about episode of this danged addictive show.
We can handle pain from a TV show, sure. But this kind of clash between our two most beloved fictional TV characters? Nope.

I'm sure it took a lot of effort for each Calzona fan to watch it all unfold  and bear watching  Sofia Robbin Sloan Torres--so innocent about the entire issue, not knowing  she was at the center of it all-- as the "prize" to be won in this painful courtroom battle.

As Kevin McKidd , director of this brilliant episode said,  this episode was INTENSE. And that was an understatement.

Every Calzona scene was filled with highly-charged emotion.

The episode indeed ripped our hearts and disturbed our psyche, thanks to the amazing writing of Tia Napolitano.

Yes, this was the Calzona Centric episode that we had long been pining for. Although of course we did not mean that we wanted  it to be sad-centric.

The Calzona Story in 42 seconds



The episode began with flashbacks of the story of Callie and Arizona.
In  42 seconds, the highlights of the  Calzona story flashed before our eyes. It was an emotional roller coaster of the ups and downs of  Calzona history.
Meredith starts the painful storytelling with this biblical tale about King Solomon and two mothers...

"There's this bible story. Two women. Both claim to be the mother of the same child. King Solomon had to choose. Two mothers, only one gets the kid."

They Tried

Back to the present day, Callie and Arizona are locked in phone negotiations  represented by their lawyers. Several times, what I heard  their lawyers say to several suggested arrangements was "that would be a HARD NO."
 
They just could not agree. On visitation schedules, summer break schedules, everything was shot down by both ends.

 

As we see here, Callie and Arizona, as advised by their lawyers, did try as a last ditch effort, to come to an agreement about sharing time with Sofia to avoid a custody battle in court.

The emotion in this phone negotiation scene was too high. Not to mention the director's amazing  selection of shots which fully conveyed the tension and stressful emotional imbroglio that both characters were going through.

 

Camera work on Callie's pacing back and forth, Arizona's shoe heel tapping,  their  hand gestures, their foot movement, signified how they were not taking this lightly. In fact, it was a very big issue if not the biggest issue of their lives.

Unsurprisingly, with their lawyers as spokespersons, they were furious with each other.

So much was at stake. Everything was at stake. Because it was about their little girl.

As perfectly worded by Arizona's lawyer:
"If we don't settle, if we go to trial, you risk losing it all. And only one of you is walking out of that court with sole custody."
Arizona: I am painfully aware of that
Lawyer: Then i urge you to consider their offer

Arizona: Their offer is insulting

And so the phone discussion ends with the much dreaded "we'll see you in court"

Mer's voice-over continues ...

"It all ends when one mom relinquishes her custody. Or else they both stand their ground, and the kid gets torn apart.

Solomon came up with a plan. He proposed a 50-50 split. Literally, it was a reasonable compromise..."

When Callie Hugs too Tight

Callie woke up anxious. It was after all, the morning of the court trial. I imagine this was even more stressful for her than her medical malpractice trial  back in Season 9.  She had a blank stare at Mer's house when she had to drop off Sofia, who in contrast, had a big smile and a hug for Aunt Maggie.
 

It seemed like Callie had a strong premonition that things were not going to be okay.

Even Sofia noticed that her Mama was not okay when she hugged her goodbye.

Callie: I'm gonna miss you so much. You know what? Mama loves you so so much. I will see you again before you know it.

Sofia: I know. You're hugging me too tight,  you're hugging me too long.

Callie's facial expression seemed like she had felt a sense of foreboding...that she might lose Sofia. And maybe this is why she was clinging too tight and didn’t want to let her daughter go at the moment.

Meanwhile, Arizona dropped by the hospital before going to the courthouse to attend to a pregnant patient who slipped and fell. This patient would be the same one who would need an emergency procedure and pull Arizona out of court later on.

Team Arizona and Team Callie Get Ready  to Rumble

Outside the courthouse, Team Arizona  coach Richard Webber had met with Arizona  with two tumblers of coffee which he ground himself. Nice and thoughtful of Webber to continue support and give counsel to Arizona at a stressful time like this.

Richard: How are you feeling? Robbins, it'll be tough. But right now you have to look past the pain into what you'll have when you're done

Arizona: At the end, I'll have a baby. That's what i tell all the laboring moms.

It was a welcome positive pep talk. To Webber, Arizona should keep her eye on winning.

 

Then on cue, they see  Team Callie (with Penny and her lawyer) walking toward the courthouse. Arizona and Callie exchange glances but it was the kind that strangers or opponents do. It felt like the prelude to a duel.

I felt nauseous. I dislike it when they treat each other as strangers and now, even as foes. They should not be sizing each other up as if they were duelers. They are not supposed to be enemies. Yet this feels like that exactly. A courtroom brawl. Between two estranged parents.

The judge described it as a "custody modification between two divorced parents. "
"The trial's witness pool is unusual in that it will be shared by both parents. Each witness will take a stand and each side may examine each witness.
Remember... you are not choosing sides. We're all along the same side, the side of a six year old child.
Custody hearings are without exception, very difficult among all parties involved. Your daughter included. Things said here will undoubtedly be harsh and cannot be unsaid. "

The gravity of the situation dawned on both Callie and Arizona as soon as the judge pounded on her gavel.

Both seemed  nervous and  in agony. Anxiety etched on their pained faces.

And the Calzona fandom unanimously breathed a very deep breath. This is it.

 

And that opening billboard with both Calzona's faces fading to white and sliding away from each other to make way for the Grey’s Anatomy OBB was portent of sad things, separation things to come.

 

This was to be the most heartbreaking episode of Calzona yet. 

The Testimonies

As we know, Callie and Arizona  invited people to testify for them.
Here is a rundown of the testimonies and how I think both sides scored:

Owen

 

Owen discussed their charity project for vets.  This definitely put Callie in a good light. Owen's words were generous with praise:
"She just cares she's always been willing to help. She's a very empathetic person. Big hearted.

She is thrown a situation, it doesn't daunt her. It inspires her. ...She just jumps in.

She's making the best of a tough situation with grace. It's something i admire about her."

Point for Callie

Andrew DeLuca

"Sofia's a blast. She's so smart and she and her mom are just laughing all the time. The place is so happy. Sofia makes the place happy. We see so much dark stuff everyday at work it's really nice to come home  to a happy kid"

DeLuca's testimony showed that Sofia had a happy environment at Arizona's house. That Sofia is a happy kid at her mama's home.
Point for Arizona

Penny

 

Penny's testimony garnered positive points at the start. She knew Sofia well in the few months that she has known the child.

As the lawyer tried to establish Penny's relationship with Sofia, we learned that Penny even knew many of Sofia's favorites. But this turned awry when Arizona's lawyer turned the questioning to the basic and easy facts.

Lawyer: Would you say you love Sofia?
Penny: I have come to love her yes

The lawyer quizzed Penny on how well she knew the child and she aced it.

Penny knew all this of Sofia:
Favorite color - blue
Favorite toy - astronaut barbie
Favorite cereal -  whole grain O's
Favorite animal - unicorn
Favorite sea creature - mermaid
Bedtime-  8:30 pm
Favorite thing to do in the morning - pick out her outfit.
Penny was confident, "you can ask me anything you want"
Penny did well. And Callie was happy, until
Lawyer: What was Sofia wearing this morning?

Penny couldn't recall
Lawyer: What grade is Sofia in?
Penny: Second grade. First

The lawyer pounced on what Penny didn’t know and this didn’t do well for the case. Callie did hope this wasn't too bad but as confirmed by their lawyer, it was very bad.

Point for Arizona

Bailey

 

Bailey as Chief of Surgery was examined on comparing Arizona and Callie's work schedules as surgeons.

Interesting to note that this is the same Bailey who officiated  at Callie and Arizona's wedding and it is sad to see that she is now on the stand to be a witness at a custody battle between the divorced couple.

For a while there, I think Bailey forgot that she was not a lawyer. She  blurted out "objection, speculation" in a lawyerly manner (this was the only humorous part of this episode) but she did go on and testified on what she knew about surgeon schedules, about being a woman surgeon and how noble the fetal surgery profession is.

It was a comparison of schedules of a doctor who does bones and a doctor who attends to babies.  Basically comparing fetal and ortho surgery.

The lawyer's main question was : Which has more unpredictable surgeries?
It was established that due to the unpredictable nature of childbirth, Dr Robbins schedule is more unpredictable.

Evidence presented showed that:

Torres logged in  27 emergency procedures and Robbins logged in 92.
Lawyer: Wouldn't you call that schedule gruelling!
Bailey: I would say it's wildly successful. But i would never  put a woman's success in the con column
Lawyer: 92 times she dropped everything, Sofia included, to go to a job
Bailey: Would you ask that if she were a man?
Lawyer : 92 times she chose work over a child.
Bailey: 92 times Dr Robbins was saving babies. Saving parents from losing their own babies!

Bailey was fully able to defend Arizona's side as a fetal surgeon who ably balanced her work with being a mother.

 

Arizona's lawyer's pep talk: “don't be discouraged . They're trying to turn your strength into weakness.”
 

Point for Callie

That evening, coming from court,  Arizona stopped by again at the hospital  checking on her patient who was disappointed that she will not be there to attend the scheduled medical procedure next day.

In a bar scene with Jo, Steph and Ben, Ben’s words which I suspect is the stand of the show, could not be more true: "A breakup is tough enough as it is but a kid in the mix...just because you're not the parent who gave birth to the kid doesn't make the kid any less yours"

On point.

Callie and Mer : The Custody Battle Over  Bottles

Next scene shows Callie  sweetly  saying “I love you”  to Sofia on the phone but  ended it with a sad  "No i don’t want to talk to mommy"

Callie and Mer were on Callie’s bed with their respective wine bottles.
Callie: I feel gross. I feel gross. The court covered me in a layer of gross that no wine can wash away

Mer was quick to the rescue
Mer: Tequila?

This bottle-worthy talk paved the way for Callie to confide about her worries. Even nearing regret that she ever started this :

Callie: What if last night was our last night?
Mer: Stop saying that
Callie : I am doing this all wrong
Mer: Mark used to say that

Callie was surprised Mer brought up that Mark called Mer when he was helpless in taking care of Sofia. Interesting because Sofia had two mommies and didn't really  have to call Mer.
Mer: the two of you were so on top of it, he didn't want you to know. He swore me to secrecy

Callie was pensive. As a self check, she knew Mark, her best friend and Sofia's birth father would not have liked this if he were alive.

Callie: He  would hate this. So much. He would find it unacceptable.
I lie awake every  night thinking maybeIi started something  I shouldn't  have.  I shouldn't have to choose between a person I love and a person I love.
Mer: I hope u don’t have to.

Callie: I tried not to love Penny, Mer. I tried... so hard.

Mer: I know. This all sucks

Let me raise some points from this scene:

1. It’s great that the Merlie friendship is alive and well. A while back, it seemed that the Mer and Callie friendship faded but nope. It's back and it was wonderful  to see  Mer  fully supported  Callie. Callie does not have a female close friend aside from Penny. Mer was the amazing friend that Callie needed at this desperate hour.

2. Callie in the process of confiding to Mer, had let out how she might be regretting this move. Mentioning that she lies awake at night thinking about how she might have made a mistake with all this, just shows the amount of stress she was going through.
That she had already  realized the consequences of her rash decisions that resulted in this unnecessary court battle. Maybe even some guilt there.

3.  Adding what Mark may think of this situation  to the story line was thoughtful of the writers. Mark is the birth dad of Sofia and whether we like it or not, we would be curious as to what his reaction to this mess would be, and Callie as the best friend who knows Mark well, knew he would not have been happy with this legal tussle.

4. Callie's words:
"I shouldn't have to choose between a person I love and a person I love" gives us insight on what burdens her on those nights she worries. She faces a dilemma because she does love Penny. She wants to go where love takes her. She is a woman who gives up things for love. But it now has become a situation where she is doomed to make a choice to give up the person she loves most (her child) for the new girl in her life who makes her happy and whom she loves.

Saying "I tried not to love Penny, Mer. I tried so hard" means Callie had been struggling with this internal dilemma. We can deduce that Callie has already seen this situation from a clearer perspective. She may have been impulsive in her decisions initially, but when she learned that Arizona wanted a lawyer between them, she may have thought this over many times and maybe had some regrets. She never really imagined it would come to this.

Sofia is Crabby

 

Arizona starts the new day  by dropping  Sofia off at Meredith's house and Amelia was there to welcome them.
Sofia was in a bad mood not wanting to separate from her mom. She woke up early and did not have breakfast.
Sofia was in her clingy-to-mama mood:
Sofia :I'm going with you
Arizona : ......Im sorry i love you
Sofia: I hate you

Thank goodness for Amelia who suggested that they find Zola to divert Sofia's focus.

What a way to start the day for Arizona. A day that would again involve a tense battle for this beautiful little child who just said she hates her.  Such a morale booster kid. Tee hee.

Testimonies Part 2

Meredith

When Mer was on the stand, the lawyer established Mer's closeness with Callie, their kids being close and that they frequently play together. Also worthy of mention is how it came from Mer, in support of her testimony, that Penny is a very good person. Hearing Mer say this is touching because it signifies that the wounds have healed and she bears no more grudges against Penny.

Mer: And Dr Torres and Sofia couldn't possibly be any closer.

Lawyer: You see them together frequently over the years?

Mer: All the time. They went to the same day care and now they're at the same school. Sofia's actually at my house right now.

And Mer describes Penny and Sofia:
Mer: Great. Sofia loves Penny. She's a great kid like that. Very open to new people as long as they're good people and Penny is a very good person.

Everything was smooth until Arizona's lawyer turned it around. A brilliant maneuver I must say.

After she  established Merlie's  symbiotic relationship as two single mothers who  help each other out with their kids, she led Mer to reply in defense of mothering and how a single parent is not a dirty word, not knowing that the lawyer was aiming for a different angle.

Mer: We lean on each other, it's not a sign of weakness or bad parenting.. It takes a village. And we have a village.

Lawyer: here in Seattle?

Exactly what the lawyer was aiming for. To establish the fact that Seattle is where Sofia is grounded

Lawyer : This essential network is all here in Seattle. Her friends, her school, her teachers her home is here in Seattle that's what Sofia would be leaving

Point for Arizona

Richard

Coach Wingman  Webber's testimony started out positing the fact that Arizona is a brilliant peds surgeon, a renowned fetal surgeon and is a role model parent.

Callie's lawyer's sleuthing however, zeroed in on Arizona's and Wingman Webber's trivia a.k.a. going-back-to-dating night adventures.

Webber supporting Arizona in going back to the dating pool is one of the most wonderful things that happened in the midst of Arizona's loneliness. And their blooming friendship, long after their authority issues history, is a beautiful thing.  It is sad that the lawyer had license to smear this alliance in that courtroom. She had found out that Webber had won 25 times in their trivia nightspot,  25 times during those "drinking and flirting days." In Arizona's words: slut shaming.

The lawyer produced the  transcript of texts between Callie and Arizona where Arizona requested to switch Mommy duties with Callie 34 times.
Robbins had been made to appear unavailable to her child most of the time due to her job and her extra curricular activities. In figures, 150 over a 180 times, Arizona shirked her duties.

Point to Callie.

In a huddle with her lawyer, Arizona was visibly upset. She deserved happiness too. There was nothing wrong with dipping her toes in the dating pool again, because it  had been a really long time since she last dated anyone. I think it was Leah easy peasy lemon squeezy whom she last dated? So there was absolutely nothing wrong with going to that nightspot often with her Wingman trivia-aficionado Webber.

Arizona: So Callie's  okay slut shaming me now? They're making me sound like a working mom is a bad mom. We just lost in there right? Cause they made me sound like i was a selfish irresponsible, sex crazed...

Lawyer: Arizona, stop.  You have your  chance right now.
They tried to rewrite your story, now's your chance to set it straight.
You need to get up there, tell them the truth.  Judge Kean is smart. She'll know the truth when she hears it. You tell the truth and you will win this .

Her lawyer's advice made it sound easy. It was as simple as telling the whole unadulterated truth and Arizona could be the winner in this crap of a battle.
Callie and Arizona also took the stand, and both their testimonies evoked much emotion. As they both cried, we cried.

The Reason that Callie is Still Alive Today

Callie recalled how she became a mother.
Lawyer : When Sofia was born, how did that day start for you?
Callie: I was in a car accident.

Callie couldn’t help but shed tears, recollecting the harrowing accident and Arizona appeared to be affected by the recollection. It brought back intense memories. It was good to see Arizona react with empathy. This was not a time to be proud or arrogant. One way or another, Arizona was moved by Callie's testimony.

Callie: I was barely conscious and the only thing that i could feel was just pain all over . I could have died on the hood of that car and i wanted to give up but i couldn't because i was pregnant with Sofia. And if i died, she died, so i had to fight to stay alive for my daughter's sake. Being a mother is the reason I'm still alive today.

This is a new perspective on Callie. We always took that incident at face value-- that she almost died in that accident , and then had a child in whose birth survival Arizona played an important part in. I never really dwelt on how Callie felt at the time. I was focused on her survival and how she wanted to recover fast so that she can hold her newly- born baby.

I did not know that the main driving force that made her fight to survive was for  Sofia to live.

This therefore gives us a fresh insight on how much love Callie has for Sofia even before she was born. Such is the love of a birth mother. It is whole, and unconditional. Nothing could be purer.

Callie fought to survive for Sofia's sake. And the reason she is alive today is because of Sofia.

Point to Callie.

DNA Does Not Make a Family, Love Does

 

During Arizona's turn on the stand, she explained how she had become Sofia's mother. And her testimony revealed, as she said it out loud for the first time, that she legally adopted Sofia.  We had always assumed this but let us mark this episode as the one where she explicitly said it.

Callie's lawyer's line of questioning got a little too insulting  for comfort when she kept badgering Arizona about Sofia's last names being Sloan and Torres. But  regardless of her emotional state, Arizona handled it excellently. How dare they question her legality as a parent just because she does not share Sofia's DNA.

This was a very sensitive issue that was tackled and if ever it did anything good, at least we saw how an adoptive mother stood up for her right to motherhood of a child she has chosen to love and call as her own.
Lawyer : Dr Robbins you were with Dr Torres before she was pregnant.
Arizona: Yes
Lawyer: Were you together before she was pregnant?
Arizona : No
Lawyer: So her pregnancy wasn’t an agreement you entered into together, correct?
Arizona : No
Lawyer: It was an agreement she entered into with Dr Mark Sloan.
Arizona: They agreed after the fact but yes, Mark was Sofia's father.
Callie and I,  were together, we were a couple before the pregnancy and then after Sofia was conceived.
Lawyer: So you became a part of the parenting plan later, correct? Just to be clear Dr Sloan and Dr Torres were Sofia's parents and then you came around
Arizona: No i didn't . I didn't  come around. I'm Sofia's mother. I legally adopted her.
Lawyer: Her last names are Sloan and Torres.
Arizona : I'm gonna have to stop you before you continue for your own sake. You're  not gonna imply that I am any less Sofia's mother because we don't share the same DNA.
Lawyer: Dr Robbins, excuse me
Arizona : Because that would be offensive. That would be offensive to anyone in the room who has an adopted child or is an adopted child and for you to say that... I chose to be Sofia's mother.  It did not fall into my lap. There was a choice and i could stay and i could run and  i chose motherhood, and it was the best choice that I have ever made.

Arizona's phone kept ringing throughout her testimony and begged to be answered . So she finally asked to be allowed to look at her phone where she saw April's emergency text.

She needed to leave for the hospital. So she gave this moving speech:
"I love my child. And i want her with me but i know that no matter how this ends she'll survive. She'll be healthy and safe and taken care of and loved because we are her mothers."

I observed Callie during this speech and it seemed she  was  moved  by what Arizona said. Arizona by her words, had implied that even if they were at odds, she totally trusts that Callie is a good mom to Sofia. They may be currently in a battle and whoever wins, she is confident that Sofia is in safe hands.

"But there is a child in the hospital who will not survive unless I’m there so I have to..."

And Arizona left the courtroom to everyone's surprise. Her phone ringing during her testimony, and her leaving the courtroom was dramatic, so I assume artistic license was utilized in this scene. I doubt if any court will allow a mobile phone ringing loosely in court and I doubt if anyone can just leave a courtroom in a huff  as Arizona did.

Arizona's Badass Surgery

Well this is Grey's Anatomy and anything is possible. Arizona had to leave this crappy custody court case because she had badass fetal surgeon duty at the hospital.

And boy, did Arizona make me uber proud by performing such a badass procedure. Yep, she actually asked a lesser doctor to scrub out and went on to return a premie back to the mom's belly.

"I'm gonna put that baby back in there so it can cook a little bit more. How does that sound to you?"

 As Karev concurred, the baby had better chances of survival if it stayed inside for the time being.

A fetus that was already out of the mom's womb and already exposed to earth, well renowned fetal surgeon Dr Robbins just put it right back into the belly. If that isn't the most badass fetal surgery we've seen in a while on Grey's,  then I don't know what is.

Arizona saved the day at the hospital. I kept thinking how relevant this was to the court battle going on simultaneously with this medical case, and I analyzed It was as if the show was making us reminisce  that day when she also saved the day for Callie and Sofia. When  after fighting her doubts and anxiety, she went ahead and significantly took over Sofia's crucial birth.  Remember when she was so badass in the musical episode and brought tears to our eyes when she was in the process of trying to save Sofia, the child of the love of her life, and triumphantly said "We have a heartbeat"

(Yes, that was when the cast and the imaginary spirit Callie were happily singing How to Save a Life). Good times.

The inspirational song "Rise Up", plays in the background, adding to the strong mixed emotions of us being proud of Arizona for her badassness in the O.R. then segue to her scene sitting on the bench outside the courthouse, probably contemplating the impending result of the case. The judge was due to issue a decision soonest.

Callie and Arizona Sitting on the Bench

Surprisingly, Callie joined her at the bench.

(Aside: I fancied seeing them side by side on that bench. I really didn't care  if they were at odds. I just had this cozy and peaceful feeling seeing them sit together. I remember that time they were discussing Callie’s  work woes  with each other on a bench at the park, way back when Sofia was not even a figment of anyone's imagination yet.  And it was one of their picturesque sweetest moments.

On my 5th re-watch, the amusement I was feeling toward this bench scene turned to an ache. I so badly want them to be together again. )

It was a positive  gesture on Callie's part to sit beside Arizona even if they were on opposing sides. She was touched by Arizona's last speech. That they are both Sofia's mothers . And that Arizona knows that Callie is a good mother.

Callie: No matter what the judge decides, i know that you're a good mom too. And i just want you to know that this does not change that

Callie was thankful for what Arizona said on the stand earlier  and seemed conciliatory.

However, Arizona was affected by the scathing words from Callie's lawyer during the proceedings  that she had to let Callie know:
"Things that you let them say about me, I would never have done that to you. Never."

This hurt. I think that even if they had gone to court, Arizona knew her limits. A custody battle can be ugly as hell but she  still retained respect for Callie. She did not allow her lawyer to engage in below the belt mudslinging out in the open. Arizona's dating game, making her appear slutty in the eyes of the court could have been left out, among others.

For Callie, maybe  a court battle is still a battle, so it is up to both parties to choose which points to emphasize in order to ensure a win, no holds barred.
Nonetheless, Arizona played decent but Callie took the competition a bit too far for Arizona's liking.

Callie seemed to have been taken aback by Arizona's statement. Realizing too late that maybe she had gone overboard,  but was not able to say anything. She did seem sorry but I guess the apologies would be set aside for later as they were interrupted by Penny that they were needed inside because the judge was waiting for them.

Still, the glorious song "Rise Up" reverberated through ...as the verdict was made but not heard nor seen on screen. They chose to let us viewers visually realize who the victor was...

I could not ignore the lyrics of the song as it took over my attention as the drama of the court battle results unfolded on my screen...

"I rise up i rise up
And I'd do it a thousand times again"

The Verdict

"If you’re wondering how the Solomon story ends , spoiler alert the true mom would rather give her baby up than have it ripped in two. But what happens when there are two true mothers"

The effect by which this revelation of the winner was executed was absolutely perfect.

They didn't spoon feed us, they used the dramatic cinematic option. Which of course  killed me.

Mer had guided Sofia to the door where Arizona was waiting .

Sofia was there, innocent, unknowing of what transpired that day. She had nary  an inkling that both mothers whom she adored had been battling over her. And there she was, fresh from her play date with Zola, smiling and clinging to her mom,  just wanting to go home, probably thinking of what toy to play with next. Her innocent reactions made me cry the most .



Then Mer reverts to where Callie was standing close by, crying uncontrollably.

Callie: How the hell did this happen? How the hell did this happen?

Callie was distraught. All feeling of loss was evident. My heart was breaking even more for Callie. It broke me. Just the previous morning at the beginning of the episode, it was she who brought Sofia over to Mer's. And now at the end of the episode, it was Arizona who was taking Sofia from Mer's house.  
Symbolic touch by the production but very painful for the viewer.

 

Mer hugged Callie. Thank goodness Mer was there for her.  The surprising twist though was when Penny comforted Callie by holding her hand, Callie brushed it aside. I for one did not expect nor understand that.
 
Callie and Penny Prospects

Maybe Callie had blamed Penny in a way,  not because she forgot what grade Sofia was in or what Sofia was wearing that day, but because if it weren't for Penny, the grant, and decision to leave, she would not be in this situation where she ended up losing her daughter.

Maybe in Callie's mind, she had begun to love and welcomed  a new woman into her life but then the trade-off was one she could not afford--losing her daughter. A daughter she loves so much more than anything else in the world.

Maybe when the reality of losing custody of Sofia crashed upon her, Callie took it out on Penny.
 
So that puts a severe strain on Penny and Callie's relationship.  To be honest, the future seems bleak for the Penelliope tandem.
 
I don't want to think if it is unfair to Penny that Callie feels this loss of love. 

Neither do I want to ask myself why I feel sorry for Penny. I'm certain she didn't want this outcome either. It was not her fault that Callie lost the case. 

Nor was it her fault that Callie lost custody of her daughter.

It was all Callie's decision.

Neither can we blame Callie for feeling contempt toward Penny. Feelings are feelings. Callie did not force herself to feel this way about Penny. Feelings just ARE.

If yesterday, Callie felt that she loved Penny so much that she was willing to drop everything for her, her career, her friends, her support system, and was all set to move to New York with Penny and Sofia, today is a totally different story. Feelings are double edged and no human can force herself to feel.

Callie may even felt blindsided by this love for Penny for it had caused her to lose the one person she loved most in her life. The child she carried in her womb, the child whom she fought hard to live for and the only reason she is on earth today.

All these factors may have led Callie to lose feelings for Penny. It is likely that she had begun to equate her relationship with Penny as the reason that she lost her child. If her feelings had transformed from love to bitterness, and had lost love for  Penny, that is what her heart says and no one could stop that.

Arizona’s Side

As for Arizona, the only reason she invited a lawyer to intervene was the fear  of losing a child she loved most. Callie was all set to move across the country and was determined to bring Sofia with her. Even though Callie consulted Arizona on their arrangements, she did not consider Arizona's feelings on the planned move. Callie seemed to have been too carried away by her love for Penny that she overlooked  how the other mother would be affected.

Arizona only feared losing a child whom she lovingly chose to be a mother to. A child who did not come from her womb but a child  chosen by her heart.

She did not want a custody battle. But the situation called for it. As she said, she had to protect herself. She had rights. She is Sofia's mother too.

It hurts her to be judged as having less rights over Sofia just because they do not share the same DNA. It is admirable how in spite of getting discouraged by this uphill battle, she did fight hard for her parental rights for Sofia. Creds to Webber's pep talk.

If Callie had not scheduled to move to New York with Penny, their custody arrangement would have  remained  smooth as before.

The situation called for this. And even though one was declared winner, in reality, no one really won. Because if there was one person who had lost the most in this stupidity of a battle, it was Sofia.

Sofia has two mothers and it is unfair for her to just experience time with just one, when both parents are alive and well.

Arizona did win but she knows how much Callie loves their child. She knows that Callie is a good mom and  does it have to mean that winning this custody battle makes her that person who withholds her other mother from Sofia?  In this case, victory is not as sweet. The win actually feels like a loss too.

Arizona did not set out to gain sole custody of Sofia just for selfishness. It was clear that she was just fearful of losing Sofia whom she wanted to stay in Seattle. It was not her fault that Callie had impulsively made a decision to leave.

Callie’s Side

On Callie's part, she is devastated by all this especially now that the reality of the situation has sunk in.

To back track, Callie's only fault (it is not even a fault) was that  she fell in love. It was a love she deserved. Penny may have been everything that she looked for in someone. Penny loved her a lot. Penny did not make her feel consumed nor empty. Maybe she and Penny were both giving to each other.

Our 'poster child for love' Callie Torres chose the life she wanted. She chose  to live for love. She only wanted happiness with the new love in her life. She may have recklessly decided to go to New York and drop her career even if the grant was only to be for one year.

Callie's sole desire was to go all out on her love for Penny. Callie is a heart-over-mind girl. She lets her heart decide and take the lead. Love comes first. Over career, over everything else, but realized there is one exception-- her child Sofia.

The problem is, she went overboard and seemed to have forgotten to consider her co-parent's sentiments.

How did it happen? Of course she could not fathom how she being the birth mother, would  lose child custody.

When Adoptive Mother Wins Against Birth Mother

Many have been up in arms about how it happened that a child's birth mother could lose custody of a child in favor of the adoptive mother. Some have been disappointed about how this story turned out, saying in reality, this could not have ended this way.

Fictional or not, let me give my two cents.

Firstly, I am grateful to Grey's Anatomy for  bringing forth to television an issue that may be faced by same sex marriages. Again, it is admirable that such a great long running show treats a lesbian couple just like any other ordinary couple facing marital woes and with a child in the midst of it all. It does not distinguish between parents who are of the same  or opposite genders. It shows us the dynamic on how lesbian marriages can have such a problem and how the characters handle the sensitive situation, which involves a birth mother and an adoptive mother.

It is easy to belittle the status of an adoptive mother. She is not the person who carried the child in her womb for months. The child does not share her blood nor DNA. So in this case, why was water thicker than blood?

Arizona had legally adopted Sofia. Even if Callie and Mark were Sofia's birth parents, as soon as Arizona was legally recognized as adoptive mother,  Arizona has gained rights to being Sofia's mother, equal to Callie the birth mother.

So once they filed this custody case in court, both were on equal footing.
Many had doubted and questioned for the longest time if Arizona had legally adopted Sofia because it never happened on screen. This episode makes that crystal clear that yes, it did happen off screen sometime ago. So all contention as to why this case even had credence to merit a court case, are now debunked.

The fact that they both set foot in court means that both have equal  rights to do so because Callie and Arizona are both legally recognized as Sofia's parents. Ergo, by law, they both have equal rights to win or lose the case.

I would not want to say that if Callie won, the pain of losing Sofia would be less for Arizona as it is now for Callie. I do not want to go there because who are we to judge on who loves Sofia more. Both are her mothers regardless of who gave birth to her. Both love her more than anything.

Both would give everything for their child. So the judge chose the victor based on all the testimonies and evidence presented to her and the judge thought this through carefully with all factors considered.

A custody battle is won, not only because of the characters or personalities  involved, but above all, decisions are made based on what circumstances would be for the best interests of the child. As the judge said in the beginning, they are all on the side of a six year old child. The court had decided on what would be best for Sofia.

Why Did Arizona Win?

Gathering my own data on the witnesses’ testimony, her lawyer's winning strategy during Penny and Mer's turn and that closing statement by Arizona before she left in a huff, I think, was what swayed the judge’s decision. As advised by her lawyer, Arizona defended herself from how the opposing lawyer demolished her personality in the eyes of the court. She had the weapon of truth on her side. Having a successful career was not an aberration to raising a child. 

Also, her earnestness in saying that she knew that whatever the results  would be, that Sofia will be well taken care of and loved because she and Callie were the mothers , may have gotten the judge’s vote. It was a noble statement. Not saying that Callie’s testimony was weaker but we saw that Arizona’s statement even struck a chord with Callie.

Sure, Arizona won. But did she, really?  She with the stunned look on her face with a faraway gaze as her daughter Sofia clung to her at the end scene.

Mer's ending voice-over breaks it to us gently:

"Its a no-win situation . And that is an entirely different story"

Post script

This episode was meant to leave us heartbroken. It was one of those episodes that you will watch again and again even if it tears your soul to bits.
The custody battle that no one ever wanted to happen, happened.
A custody battle that has one winner and one loser. And the child is left with one mother. So in that case, no one really wins.

As expected, the lawyers made an unbearable situation even worse. The lawyering strategy of twisting words and facts and painting an unpleasant picture of each of them to prove that one is a more deserving and more able mom than the other.

Their friends  were placed in a tricky situation where they were constrained to choose sides, but the witnesses were shared so this was easier to bear.

Articles about the next episode suggest that there might be awkwardness in the hospital among the doctors who "took sides" in the case. I think that each team just did that to support Callie and Arizona and I believe that if ever there are hard feelings because of this, it will heal in no time. After all, they are all friends at the hospital to begin with. Taking sides was necessary and understandable.

The episode was aesthetically pleasing. It was not your usual Grey’s Anatomy episode filled with white coats and OR scenes. The colors and atmosphere of the location shots added to the texture of the episode. It is always a welcome sight to see the doctors in regular non-doctor attire.  Callie and Arizona looked stunning  in their black courtroom garb. And the sisters at Mer's house were casually cute in their house wear.

I highly praise Kevin Mc Kidd's work, as he gave sensitive and full attention to the details of the episode. His thoughtful use of color, toys Sofia played with, the relaxing outdoor shots, neutralized the otherwise tense scenes. I would rank this as one of my top fav episodes of the season not because it is Calzona centered, well yeah of course because of that, but because Kevin as director made the episode fresh, in various aspects. 

If you hear that an episode is about a custody battle, you would expect a drab setting with all the boring courtroom  elements. But this one had a different look and feel to it. His artistic approach to the episode made me feel the tension and emotion with his courtroom shots and Calzona lawyer huddle discussions but he balanced them all out with  his fresh, attractive presentation of scenes that involve Sofia, making us not forget that this episode is not just about the  courtroom brawl of the Calzona pairing, but is also about the well-being of a sweet,  beautiful happy child who  has a ready smile on her face, who readily hugs her moms and her mom's  friends and who really only cares about playing with her toys, her playmate and being with her moms. This episode is indeed something Kevin should be proud of.

Words are not enough to describe how much I was moved by the sensitive acting of Sara Ramirez and Jessica Capshaw, who brought their A-Game to this episode,  and most especially Eva Ariel Binder.

Eva played Sofia perfectly. One simply cannot help but cry seeing that adorable face say "you’re hugging me too tight. You’re hugging me too long" which incidentally is my favorite scene of this episode. For me, just those two sentences from Eva Ariel  was Emmy-worthy.

She was more than successful in making us feel like we want to hug Sofia every minute she was on screen.

The way she spoke to Callie and Arizona was pure magic. And her smile always lights up all the dark corners of the screen and the sad corners of my heart. In my opinion, she is the perfect kid to be cast as six-year-old happy kid Sofia.

Special kudos also to the awesome  acting of the two lawyers Gwendoline Yeo and Vanessa Bell Calloway who were the receivers of our disdain as they led on all the witnesses and turned facts around  to win the judge's favor. They did the lawyering bit so damn well we forget they're actors.

Moving forward

Where does Calzona go from here? That remains to be seen.
Callie is broken. How she cried during the last scene spelled her inconsolable devastation. She will be at a loss. And I doubt if anything will assuage her sadness.

Arizona won sole physical custody so Sofia resides with her and under her supervision,  with reasonable visitation by Callie. It is not like the court bars Callie from seeing Sofia because as established in court, Callie is a good mother too and is not unfit  (as in cases of parents who mistreat their children).

Callie could approach Arizona and and maybe just maybe, they can work something out eventually.

Arizona meanwhile, may have relished her victory for a minute but I do know for sure that because of her love for Sofia, she would not be the kind of custody battle winner who would be happy about her child not seeing her other mother.  She knows how much Sofia means to Callie. She very well knows that Callie is Sofia's birth mother. And she may be angry at Callie until now, but I allow myself to indulge in the thought that of course she wouldn't want Callie to be unhappy. Arizona would not be the person who would take Sofia away from Callie. Arizona did this all IN DEFENSE.

So now that she had won, the mixture of relief, a little happiness that her child will stay with her and not leave for another state, there is that evident hint of sadness and emptiness over her triumph. She knows that in her happiness, another human heart is grieving and longing for a child separated from her.  And that human heart happens to belong to Sofia’s other true mother. 

Knowing Arizona, she will not want this to happen for long. Especially if Sofia looks for Callie. Sofia is used to being in both homes of her mothers. She will definitely ask questions if that stops or is reduced, and I am sure Sofia will not bear not seeing Callie so I really doubt if this sole physical custody will even happen for a long time.

Penny may be out of the picture sooner than we thought. Samantha is not on the guest star list for the finale.

12x22 may as well be the lowest that Calzona could go since season 9 and should I say there is nowhere to go but up.

I hope for good things both for Callie and Arizona. We were with them through their highs and lows and we never wavered.
This episode may just be the saddest and I congratulate every Calzona heart for having survived this episode. I feel that the storm has reached its peak, I can see a bright,  better future from hereon.

I hope that little by little, Callie and Arizona, will be brought together again not only by Sofia,because indeed, Sofia has two true mothers who love her unconditionally,  but also by remembering each other as good, loving persons, for they both have a kind and beautiful heart.
 
I will never forget how intrigued I was about this song that started during Arizona's heroic save at the O.R. , that played during their bench talk, and throughout the conclusion of the court battle.

It’s as if Shonda knew about our hashtag #CalzonaWillRise .

I needed to post the full lyrics of the song because my soul told me so ...

You're broken down  and tired
Of living life on a merry-go-round
And you can't find the fighter
But I see it in you so we gonna walk it out
And move mountains
We gonna walk it out
And move mountains

And I'll rise up
I'll rise like the day
I'll rise up
I'll rise unafraid
I'll rise up
And I'll do it a thousand times again
And I'll rise up
High like the waves
I'll rise up
In spite of the ache
I'll rise up
And I'll do it a thousand times again
For you

When the silence isn't quiet
And it feels like it's getting hard to breathe
And I know you feel like dying
But I promise we'll take the world to it's feet
And move mountains
Bring it to it's feet
And move mountains
And I'll rise up
I'll rise like the day
I'll rise up
I'll rise unafraid
I'll rise up
And I'll do it a thousand times again
For you


All we need, all we need is hope
And for that we have each other
And for that we have each other
We will rise
We will rise
We'll rise, oh oh
We'll rise

I'll rise up
Rise like the day
I'll rise up
In spite of the ache
I will rise a thousand times again
And we'll rise up
High like the waves
We'll rise up
In spite of the ache
We'll rise up
And we'll do it a thousand times again
For you 

 
How relevant. How fitting. How miraculous that as the song soared with its inspiring notes during the closing scenes, it was also raising our spirits.
As if to echo what our hearts had been hoping for, for a very long time... 

The amazing lyrics of this wonderful song which is not only inspiring, but befits the Calzona story perfectly at this time.

More than ever, I feel it coming. I feel that this is the start of something beautiful.
After the storm, after going through the darkest day, the sun too shall rise.
And Calzona, after all is said and done, after all these difficulties that their relationship weathered,  being the strong and loving women that they are, they will rise.

  
The two true mothers took different paths in life, but after some time,  their roads diverged. 

Their daughter was still their sunshine...and they loved their daughter more than ever. 

One day they got together and discovered they could love each other again. Because they rediscovered each other's heart and  they both love their daughter in the same way. So they loved each other again, loved each other better, together with their beautiful daughter.

Tomorrow, the two true mothers and their daughter  start their happily ever after.

 

And I say it again, louder and with all conviction and undying love for this couple, whose love for each other we held faith in for so long.  

A couple that symbolizes that after all the hardship and trials, that true love wins, and it will do so beautifully, Calzona will rise.

#ChooseCalzona

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